It seems inevitable. You spend a few hours searching for comparisons of personals websites, then a few more finding someone that seems interesting enough to reach out to and at least take on a date. Then comes the actual meeting and your foot ends up in your mouth so quickly it seems like it’s always been there. We know the feeling. Thankfully, though, we also know how to get passed thing and on to the dates you should be enjoying. When it comes to getting the wording right or just trying to carry a conversation, sometimes the best thing to know is simply what to avoid. In fact, most guys tend to go into a date thinking they will just be themselves and run with it. We aren’t saying you have to pretend to be someone else, but not coming off as arrogant, self-centered, or completely detached from reality is a good place to start. Chances are, if you aren’t thinking about what you say before you say it that is exactly what is going to happen.
Anything to Do with Comparing Her Looks to Someone Else
This one might seem easy enough to avoid, but you would be surprised how many guys seem to think this doesn’t apply so long as it’s a compliment. The best thing to do is not make any comparisons at all. Yes, even to famous movie stars, singers, models, and what not. Not only is there a decent chance she may not even get the reference, but there’s also a good chance that if she does get it she won’t like it or will at least disagree. The thing is, if you are exaggerating, she’ll know it and will be watching your every word for the rest of the night. She will be trying to figure out if you are trying to get something from her if you use too much flattery or try to say she’s much prettier than she actually is. Women know how pretty they are. Don’t try to jump too many numbers from the first time you meet. This can be cute later in the relationship, but if you start complimenting her from the word go, she will never take it seriously.
Then, of course, there are some cases where she doesn’t know who you’re talking about, or don’t like the comparison. You just met. There is no real way to know enough about her to know what she will take as a compliment or who she has even heard of before. It’s a big world and we all have such small parts of it that expecting her to know all the same things you do is a little farfetched at best. You can’t expect the same sort of break down you would find in a profile page on EstablishedMen.com to be available up front when you meet her in person. So do not expect her to know about the same celebrities or appreciate any comparisons you might make.
If you want to compliment her, tell her why you find her attractive. Start with something not overtly sexual. Especially if this is really a date and not just a hook up, you need to let her know you are into her not just getting into her pants. So compliment what she’s wearing. Tell her the color looks good on her. Talk about her hair and what you like about it. Did she do her makeup really well? Share a little about how it really makes you notice how pretty her eyes are. Just don’t tell her they remind you of someone else’s. It doesn’t matter if you say she reminds you of the most well-known model in the world. She doesn’t want to be someone else to you. She wants to be herself and be appreciated for that. So make it about her and not in comparison to anyone else and you’ll avoid having to double back to find another comparison of personals websites. If you want, you can check our comparison and read EstablishedMen hookup site review. Our excellent review can help you make a decision.
Anything about Your Sex Life or Your Ex
When it comes to the first date this is really the last thing you want to talk about. Not only does it cast you in a negative light for talking about something that either didn’t work out or something that just really isn’t appropriate discussion for two people who don’t know anything about each other, but you are also turning the conversation away from her and making it all about you. On top of that, talking about your Ex in particular is a giant red flag for most women. It either makes you sound like you aren’t over her yet, or that you don’t own up to your own problems in relationships. Every woman in the world has heard the story about their boyfriend’s crazy ex, and you know what most of them have learned by the end of it? A majority of the time, that crazy ex wasn’t crazy at all and that any guy that enters into a relationship talking about how insane his ex went is usually just giving them a heads up to get out while they still can.
The only time your sex life is worth discussing when you first meet someone is when you’re meeting them for a hook up. Then, it’s always a good idea to find out what each other has experience in and enjoys in the bedroom. When you talk about it on the first date, however, things get really awkward really fast and unless you want a quick trip back to a comparison of personals websites, its best not to even broach the topic. All it does is send warning flags that you just want to get laid, or, at the very least, that it doesn’t matter who you’re talking to right then. She will take it as you not being interested in her specifically and when it comes to dating in particular, you really need to rein it in until she shows some interest.
Negative Commentary on Anyone around You
This one often comes as a surprise to a lot of men, so if you often find yourself wondering why you can never get anyone to call back or agree to a second date, really review your previous conversations to see if this might be you. The fact of the matter is that negativity in general never leaves a good impression. When you’re trying to impress a woman well enough to see her again, negativity is definitely not the way to go. She wants to know about you and share a bit about herself. Perhaps you went to a venue and she wants to enjoy a show or performance as well. If you spend the whole time making jokes about how bad the performance is, putting down the food, or talking about how much better some other place is, she really won’t remember anything else you had to say or whether or not she was enjoying herself otherwise. We all focus on the negative, women included. So when you spend the entire night making negative commentary, even if it’s been sprinkled throughout, what you’re really doing giving her a negative opinion of you.